Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo has advised men to look beyond women who constantly demand money, gifts and material possessions when choosing a partner, urging them to consider women who can contribute to their growth and future.
Speaking on relationships and marriage, the pastor said some men complain that women are only interested in what they can gain from them, while failing to examine the kind of women they pursue.
“You're always looking for girls that are taking from you. You see the ones that can support you and help you; you don't want that one,” he said.
Okonkwo also cautioned against turning relationship experiences into generalisations about men and women, describing the ongoing “gender war” as misplaced.
“Don't join all this gender war: men are scum, women are scum. It's a lie. It's the type you are chasing,” he said.
The pastor also challenged the idea that men should wait until they become financially successful before getting married.
According to him, marrying a supportive partner can help a man achieve his goals faster rather than becoming an obstacle to his progress.
“When you marry a good woman, she's a multiplier for everything in your life. And that changed when I met and married my wife. Things that were moving slowly began to go fast,” Okonkwo said.
He explained that marriage can bring together the strengths, talents and networks of two people, creating opportunities that may not have been possible individually.
Using real estate as an example, Okonkwo said a couple could combine their professional connections and skills to expand their opportunities and improve their chances of success.
“All your talents are inside her, or inside him, and coming together, two are better than one. They have a great reward for their labour,” he said, referencing the biblical principle of two people working together.
His comments centred on the importance of choosing a partner based not only on attraction or what they can provide materially, but also on their ability and willingness to build alongside one another.
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